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tatehorror:

*rebels cautiously*

i hate when people ask “who you tryna look good for?!” bitch myself bye

drwilfredcokepepper:

ghost-anus:

the best pranks are the super harmless ones

like why would you pull someones pants down in public or like put them in danger or humiliate them when you can just baffle them by leaving tiny plastic camels all over their house or taping bill cosby’s face over every single face in  every picture in their house?

Last year the seniors had a mariachi band follow the principle for 3 hours


Sirius:  *Writing a letter to James*
Sirius:  Deer James
Lily:  It's Dear
Sirius:  No it isn't

rnackenzie:

its hard being hilarious when everyone ignores you

stansusedbloggingemporium:

When I was just starting high school, a girl who rode my bus invited me to stay the night at her house and when I did she got really emotional and told me no girls ever stayed over because she was a lesbian and if you don’t think that’s the saddest thing ever you need to re-evaluate your life

bird-on-a-leash:

paperwhale:

claydols:

your bra strap is showing please hide it because it is suggestive. also your boobs are producing lumps in your shirt please hide them. your butt is in the same situation please get rid of it. also your legs. your arms. your face.

image

I can see your feet and it’s very distracting and slightly arousing.

0ffic3cha1r:

generalbooty:

yeah so i slept with this dude last night and idk we were chatting a bit  during the sexy time and for some reason his birthday came up and i was like “wait 25th of september? DUDE me TOO, wtf thats such a coincidence” and he was like “really? we have the same birthday? are u fuckin with me?” and i just looked down at his penis literally inside my vagina and was like “well technically yeah” and he was like haha nice one and high fived me

Get married